Summary
A repeat subject and we will take a harsher stand this time.
Objective
What is porn and what are its effects? How do we resist the temptations and/or break the habit?
Pornography, long ago was found in the “dirty book store” or the “red light district” or the bad part of town. Today it is right in your living room, your bedroom, in living color and HD. It’s the age of technology, freedom of expression is king, morality is not cool. If Al Gore invented the Internet then his copilot was a guy named Beelzebub! The 21st Century scourge, the global, multi-billion dollar enterprise that entices, titillates, excites some, at the same time demeaning, enslaving and addicting. The Lion of Lust, the devil itself is winning the Game of Souls. Like an alcoholic, it starts with a sip and inevitably leads to a binge; it draws us in to a web of ever grosser debauchery. It knows no boundaries, it can sink its claws into man, woman, or child, atheist, Christian, layperson, religious, father, son, sister, husband. It temps us, entraps us, excites us, provides temporary relief , but then it slams us with compulsion, guilt, shame, self-hatred, remorse, emptiness and pain. Worse it can destroy relationships, families, and turns us away from God. For how could anyone, let alone God, forgive us for such depravity?
Gentleman, plain and simple, just as we have a War on Terror, a war is being waged against our spirit and it is called Lust and we are losing…one glimpse at a time.
Catechism Readings:
1. Paragraph 2396
Among the practices gravely contrary to chastity are masturbation, fornication, and pornography.
2. Paragraph 2341
The virtue of chastity comes under the cardinal virtue of temperance, which seeks to permeate the passions and appetites of the senses with reason.
3. Paragraph 2337
Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of man in his bodily and spiritual being.
4. Paragraph 2351
Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure. Sexual pleasure is morally disordered when sought for itself, isolated from the procreative and unitive purposes. Masturbation is sinful because it misuses the gift of sexuality in an inherently selfish act, devoid of love. It is a behavior problem whose causes are often habitual or in response to emotional stress or unexamined underlying attitudes. Pornography (sexually explicit material) has become even more available through the Internet. This presents real difficulties for both individuals and society, as viewing pornography is not only sinful in itself but can become an addiction and lead to dangerous exploitation of children as sex objects.
5. Paragraph 2354
Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants (actors, vendors, the public) since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profits for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials.
Bible Readings
1. Numbers 15:39
And it shall be a tassel for you to look at and remember all the commandments of the Lord, to do them, not to follow your own heart and your eyes, which you are inclined to do.
2. Gal 5:16
But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.
3. 1Cor 6:18-20
Avoid immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the immoral person sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been purchased at a price. Therefore glorify God in your body.
4. Rom 12:1-2
I urge you therefore, by the mercies of God, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship. Do not conform yourself to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect.
5. 1Thes 4:7-8
For God did not call us to impurity but to holiness. Therefore, whoever disregards this, diregards not a human being but God, who gives his holy Spirit to you.
6. Gal 5:19-21
Now the works of the flesh are obvious: immorality, impurity, licentiousness, idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, rivalry, jealousy, outbursts of fury,, acts of selfishness, dissensions, factions, occasions of envy, drinking bouts,, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Small Group Questions
1. How do you avoid the temptations of lust?
2. How do you prepare your children to deal with the temptations of pornography?
3. What do you do if caught in this cycle of lust?
4. How do you pray to God for help?
Accountability
1. Pray in the morning when you wake and in the evening when you rest for God’s help in resisting temptation for that period. Do it every day, if you must.
2. Confession is crucial.
3. Surrender the problem to God, seek his help, you do not have to battle alone.
Recommended Resources
1. tobinstitute.org (Theology of the Body)
2. theravive.com (Christian Therapists)
3. sa.org (Seaholics Anonymous—12 Step Program, built off AA)
4. Sexaholics Anonymous Manual (The 12 Step Program)
5. pornnomore.com (Serenellians—An Apostolate of Hope for the Sexually Addicted)
6. virtusonline.com
7. sexualrecovery.org
8. sca-recovery.org
9. saa-recovery.org
10. slaafws.org
11. zachhunter.me (his book “Be the Change”)
12. saragroves.com (Musician)
13. ijm.org
14. itemp.org
15. truthminers.com
16. abolitioninternational.org
17. settingcaptivesfree.com
Included Resources
There is help whether you have the problem, are part of the problem or want to work on the recovery/solution.
Twenty Questions (sa.org)
1. Have you ever thought you needed help for your sexual thinking or behavior?
2. That you’d be better off if you didn’t keep “giving in”?
3. That sex or stimuli are controlling you?
4. Have you ever tried to stop or limit doing what you felt was wrong in your sexual behavior?
5. Do you resort to sex to escape, relieve anxiety, or because you can’t cope?
6. Do you feel guilt, remorse, or depression afterward?
7. Has your pursuit of sex become more compulsive?
8. Does it interfere with your relations with your spouse?
9. Do you have to resort to images or memories during sex?
10. Does an irresistible impulse arise when the other party makes the overtures or sex is offered?
11. Do you keep going from one relationship or lover to another?
12. Do you feel the right relationship would help you stop lusting, masturbating, or being so promiscuous?
13. Do you have a destructive need—a desparate sexual or emotional need for someone?
14. Does pursuit of sex make you careless for yourself or or the welfare of your family or others?
15. Has your effectiveness or concentration decreased as sex has become more compulsive?
16. Do you lose time from work?
17. Do you turn to a lower environment when pursuing sex?
18. Do you want to get away from the sex partner as soon as possible after the act?
19. Although your spouse is sexually compatible, do you still masturbate or have sex with others?
20. Have you ever been arrested for a sex related offense?
The cure can be spiritual.
The Twelve Steps of Sexaholics Anonymous
We admitted we were powerless over lust—that our lives had become unmanageable.
Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand Him.
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry the message to sexaholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Author
Humbly, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit and in hope that the message will touch a chord with at least some, Charles Pfizenmayer